Nan writes romance novels about women who are in their prime. She firmly believes you're never too old to experience the joy and passion of love. I agree!
Note to Self
And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. — Anais Nin, US (French-born) author & diarist (1903 – 1977)
Suddenly, I thought, “This is my body. I live in it. I play in it. I can’t deny it anymore. This is my fat body. I’m standing at the corner of Life and You Better Get Going. I stepped off the curb and never looked back. — Camryn Manheim, American actress (1961–)
I have to admit, I was much more aware of my sensuality when I was younger (and thinner), but being so young meant I was unable to really appreciate that aspect of my femininity. Instead, I wallowed in guilt because good girls didn’t acknowledge or act on those kinds of feelings, and besides, I had no idea how to separate sensuality from stupid teenaged libido. I married young, got bigger, and my sensuality truly went into hiding in the midst of pregnancies, mothering, and the day-to-day trials of marriage and having a family. All you Baby Boomer women know exactly what I mean, right?
But when I began to manifest menopause symptoms—hot flashes, night sweats, short-term memory loss, moods swings, restlessness—something else very surprising happened to me. One summer day, I actually stopped and looked at myself after a shower—something I’d never done before. I’d always ignored mirrors as much as possible since the woman reflected there wasn’t even close to America’s skinny ideal. I gazed at the round woman in the glass—flushed from the shower, her blonde hair damp and tousled, her blue eyes sparkling, and I had an epiphany. I’m pretty. And curvy. And actually, kinda sexy.
That day something opened up in me and since then all my senses seem to be heightened. I’m hyper-aware of how things taste, like juicy fresh pears or red wine and chocolate; of how light and shadow play on surfaces; how music sounds; how much I enjoy the touch of strong male fingers on my skin. I love the sun on my face or a breeze in my hair. I love putting on lotion—it’s a minutes-long stroking experience now, instead of a slap-dash rub and hurrying into my baggy pants and top to cover up. I love wearing clothes that are silky or soft rather than sweats, clothes that reveal and enhance my shape instead of hide it. I even started sleeping nude just for the touch of the cool sheets against my skin and the feel of a warm body next to mine.
I’ve discovered my sensuality again. But this time, I’m older and aware of how very brief a time we have on this Earth, in this body—my body. My round, bumpy, beautiful . . . sexy body.
Note to self–you are a delight exactly as you are!
But writing is Nan’s first and most enduring passion. She can’t remember a time in her life when she wasn’t writing—she wrote her first romance novel at the age of ten, a love story between the most sophisticated person she knew at the time, her older sister (who was in high school and had a driver’s license!) and a member of Herman’s Hermits. If you remember who they are, you are Nan’s audience! She’s still writing romance, but now from the viewpoint of a wiser, slightly rumpled, menopausal woman who believes that love never ages, women only grow more interesting, and everybody needs a little sexy romance.
Her first novel Rule Number One is available at Amazon.com and Barnes&Noble.com. The other two, Once More From the Top and Sex and the Widow Miles — the first novels in the Women of Willow Bay series, are available exclusively at Amazon.
Visit Nan’s website: www.nanreinhardt.com
Talk to Nan at: email@example.com